Published June 2010
The Battered Suitcase
cryptic nihilistic
by Alison Ross
the cryptic nihilist
wears purple shades
that see into yer soul
and she can read your mind
with a magnifying glass
the cryptic nihilist
has been to hell and back
she said it was a nice trip
and the devil was friendly enough
but when she got home
she was so thirsty
she drank a gallon of water
and then turned into jesus
the cryptic nihilist
stays up for all hours
listening to classical music in reverse
and translating kierkegaard
into lolspeak
cuz OMG WTF: dude is deep!
the cryptic nihilist
once met buddha on the road
but before she could kill him
he burst into flames
he briefly reincarnated into
a jug of wine
so she could drink away the pain
but she laughed
and smashed a mirror instead
she considers herself a neo-cryptic nihilistic freak. she believes in god (but only as an acronym that will self-destruct in five minutes). she wraps herself in the confederate flag, lynches conformity, then recites the pledge of allegiance in technicolor tongues.
the cryptic nihilist once scrawled grafitti on the white house that read: "rearranging chaos is partly why i'm here."
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